This is a word I know all too well. But, surprisingly I am still here; living, breathing, laughing, crying, yet each time as cliche as it sounds I am stronger. Stronger than ever. Forever a student taking my lessons in life. Some more difficult than others, but you know what? If I have made it this far I am built with something powerful, we all are, even you.
I know right now you're feeling overwhelmed, lost, confused, looking for answers that you know even if you found them, that deep down you would still feel empty, I promise you this. But the answer is to not fill this emptiness with the answers that we think we are looking for, or to dwell on the past and hope you did things differently. Instead put your trust in the greater plan and accept that you cannot control everything and who would want, lets be honest that would be stressful.
You see, I right now am also experiencing this heartbreak, currently. It does feel quite lonely, I'm not going to sugar coat it. It feels like betrayal, the worst kind of pain, its a lost kind of hope; hope that you two will end back together somehow in the distant future. I call this a lost hope simply because of this reason that we should not hope to reunite with someone who has broken, disrespected and played with us this much. Instead we should hope for greater things such as: hope that you will rebuild yourself stronger than ever, hope that you will not devalue yourself or settle just because the pain of separating or change is even worse and finally hope that you do not lose yourself, your kind heart and your ability to love or fall in love again.
In today's day and age we are often told that the way to succeed is to become somewhat heartless, to not show feelings as it makes you vulnerable. This right here is what led you to your heartbreak in the first place except you were on the receiving end. Which in my opinion is the better end.
Sure it may be tempting to be numb to all the pain but it would also make you numb to the affection of another person, the love of that other person. Therefore, adding to this cycle that already exists.
This isn't what love is. This is not what you are looking for. Since when was being vulnerable in this world seen as a weakness, since when was showing what you truly feel seen as a being too forward, since when was being kind towards others seen as strange?
My message to you if not anything is try and try again, in your own time, once you feel strong and ready enough cause love no matter how true it is will always be hard. If you feel like giving up then just remember that at least by trying you are one step closer than stopping completely.
You may have convinced yourself that you want nothing to do with this again. That you don't want to feel love again, the highs or the lows. That is okay. That is more than okay.
I guess what I'm trying to say is do what your heart tells you, even if it gets you into a hell lot of a mess or back into this place called heartbreak. Because with this all though you may get hurt, you will feel content, because you have been true to yourself which is the most important. You have listened to your soul. And finally you are and will be capable of loving again and being loved