Back again with another story to share! this week’s story is about Arifa who is a blogger herself and wants to share with us a personal time of her childhood and what she took from it. Thank you Arifa! for taking part. Hope you’ll enjoy this post and can relate!
The Time I Had To Grow Up – Arifa’s Story
So, I came to the UK in 2004 as a refugee. And as part of the process we were moved to Glasgow for some time until we got the right to live in the UK permanently. I was eight years old then and spent two years in Glasgow. I went to school there and even started practising hijab there. It was hard enough for me to merge in with the culture, on top of that my mum insisted me to wear a scarf. To be fair I’m glad she did, it’s much easier to learn to embrace the hijab when you start wearing it at a young age.
I was also the only child my parents had, they were trying for a good few years for another child but it seemed that it wasn’t meant for them. They wanted a son all these years. Finally Allah (God) blessed them with one. He was beautiful. But unfortunately he wasn’t meant to be. He passed away after 43 days exactly and left us all. Maybe he will be the channel to heaven for us, as they say an innocent life goes straight to heaven and pulls his loved ones with them.
That was probably one of the most challenging times for me and my family. Losing a child isn’t easy especially when you have yearned for one. At that time, I think I had a lot of challenges going on and my parents unfortunately were too indulged in their sorrows to pay attention to my problems, while growing up.
I was the only one who wore a scarf in school and to an extent was disliked by many. I would not say I was ever bullied alhamdulillah, but I didn’t have any real friends either. I am not trying to make this situation about myself or be ungrateful or take away from the hardships my parents were facing whilst coping with their loss. To be honest, if that didn’t happen I would not have truly grown up. It was because of those incidents I grew up into the Muslim now practising patience in my day to day life.
There were times where I used to hate going to school. I used to question things like why bad things were happening to good people like us. Most importantly I used to wonder why my parents were upset to the point they couldn’t make time for me like normal. But I used to distract myself and focus on my studies.
I started to take control of my own life and the direction I was heading at. I realised that my parents were humans too, and when they experienced challenging times they simply couldn’t be the superheroes in my life hearing my struggles. They may not have been such major problems but at that time they certainly were.
Some trust in God takes you a long way. Just know that you would not be facing the struggles if you weren’t seen as capable of dealing with them by God. He does not burden a soul more than it can bare and the hard times are there to teach you something. Be grateful of his mercy and know that there’s something hidden in his decision. This helps you maintain patience. Another tip I would give to those going through a hard patch is to surround yourselves with good people. Sometimes your environment can add to the challenges you face and cutting away the negative people is better.
– Arifa Suleman (Writer of The Regeneration)
- Link to Arifa’s Blog: https://theregenerationsite.wordpress.com
- Follow The Regeneration Site on Instagram: @the_regeneration_