Lessons From 2017

Hi guys! So today I thought I’d write a post about what I’ve learnt in 2017. Along with things I’m leaving in 2017. As cliche as it sounds. It is a new year, so it’s time for some real changes. I’m sure we’ve all experienced a lot this year, so here’s what I’ve learnt this year.

1. You can’t control everything.

Honestly, you can’t. That doesn’t mean stop trying or stop chasing your dreams. It just means when things don’t go to plan. Its fine. There are things out of your control and that is fine. There are many plans but there is only one true goal, and as long as you get there you’ll be fine! Stop worrying so much.

2. If they wanted to, they would.

That line right there. I’ve heard all the excuses and all the scenarios, but honestly if they wanted to. They would. There’s nothing truly external that is stopping them. It’s internal, it’s the fact that they don’t want to. This is a lesson we only need to realise. No ifs, no buts. No comparison or praise of their character or heart. They didn’t want it so they didn’t get it. Simple as that.

3. Not everyone was raised the same way as you.

Stop thinking everyone has a good heart or wants the same thing or even reacts the same way. We are all different and that’s the beauty. Accept the differences and don’t take it as an attack on your morals or character. Don’t blindly believe people are all kind hearted. There are bad people and this is a bad world. Realise that everyone is different, was raised in a different environment, have different experiences and stories. So they are bound to react differently than you.

4. If you’re not ready, don’t do it.

Pressure from peers or family is difficult to put up with and often we give in and conform. But realise that if you don’t speak up now, you will eventually snap. If you are not ready, don’t do it. Its better to not start, than to leave mid way.

5. Forgiveness doesn’t mean forget.

For a long time I thought if I have forgiven someone that I must go back to how I once was with them, otherwise I was being hypocritical. But honestly you can forgive and not forget. It is not your job to maintain anything or rebuild trust. Don’t feel guilty for cutting contact. You’ve done enough by forgiving.

6. Patience is a long road.

You can’t just wake up one day and expect to be patient or expect things to not tick you off. Learning patience is a long road and you will snap. But it’s the intention that is there and overtime you will just learn not to react to every single scenario.

7. If you are not content it isn’t worth it.

There have been so many times where I have just stuck to something or someone just because of the work I’ve put in. Even though I know it was causing me distress and disturbing my peace and making me react as a completely different person. I still held on and that was silly. If you are not content, if you are always worrying or stressed. If you are not happy. It isn’t worth no matter what or who it is.

8. You don’t have to be nice to everyone.

Some people literally do not deserve it. Especially those who constantly mistreat you. Your job is not to maintain peace and be nice. If you are not respected as a person, leave. Life is too short for this.

9. Love and Marriage is not the be all and end all.

We are constantly fed this idea in society and media from a very young age. There are many other goals and opportunities out there for you. Yes companionship is important, but if it hasn’t happened for you yet, don’t force it with anyone. Settling is not what it’s about. Focus on other goals and aspirations and everything will come in it’s own time.

10. Faith

After continuously rejecting my faith for years on end. I learnt that I actually do need it. And it’s not at all as it is described to be. It is now one of my many strengths for which I am ever grateful for. It is now as important to me as education itself. Faith can be a wonderful thing in an individuals life.

11. Change will be commented on.

Whatever change you go through, people will always talk. Don’t stop growing as a person because people are comfortable with the way you are now. Life is all about growth. People talk all the time if it’s not about you, it’s about someone else.

I want to thank everyone who encouraged me to start this blog and to keep writing. You guys have truly been amazing this year! And have opened up so many opportunities for me.

Thank you and a happy new year!

Pale x